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	<title>Comments for Ruthless Compassion Institute</title>
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	<link>http://www.ruthlesscompassioninstitute.com</link>
	<description>Taking personal responsibility for our actions</description>
	<lastBuildDate>Fri, 22 Jan 2010 16:49:59 -0500</lastBuildDate>
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		<title>Comment on Ruthless Compassion in Relationship, Part II by Nancy Adler</title>
		<link>http://www.ruthlesscompassioninstitute.com/articles/philosophy-psychology/ruthless-compassion-in-relationship-part-ii/#comment-73</link>
		<dc:creator>Nancy Adler</dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Fri, 22 Jan 2010 16:49:59 +0000</pubDate>
		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.ruthlesscompassioninstitute.com/?p=77#comment-73</guid>
		<description>Thank you, beautiful. I agree, &#039;it is time.&#039; Time to celebrate our differences, stand up in who we are as individuals and enrich one another by cultivating through direct communication in love and grace.

Blessings, Nancy</description>
		<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Thank you, beautiful. I agree, &#8216;it is time.&#8217; Time to celebrate our differences, stand up in who we are as individuals and enrich one another by cultivating through direct communication in love and grace.</p>
<p>Blessings, Nancy</p>
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		<title>Comment on Ruthless Compassion in Relationship, Part I by Nancy Adler</title>
		<link>http://www.ruthlesscompassioninstitute.com/articles/philosophy-psychology/ruthless-compassion-in-relationship-part-i/#comment-40</link>
		<dc:creator>Nancy Adler</dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Wed, 30 Dec 2009 18:05:10 +0000</pubDate>
		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.ruthlesscompassioninstitute.com/?p=74#comment-40</guid>
		<description>Beautifully written. Thank you for including the wide spectrum of relationships.

For me, it is a matter of trusting and loving myself fully. Staying emotionally engaged when I feel it honors who I am and the gentleman in the relationship. 

And trusting my knowing when it is time to move forward.

Blessings,
 ~ Nancy</description>
		<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Beautifully written. Thank you for including the wide spectrum of relationships.</p>
<p>For me, it is a matter of trusting and loving myself fully. Staying emotionally engaged when I feel it honors who I am and the gentleman in the relationship. </p>
<p>And trusting my knowing when it is time to move forward.</p>
<p>Blessings,<br />
 ~ Nancy</p>
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		<title>Comment on Ruthless Compassion in Relationship, Part II by Thi Stith</title>
		<link>http://www.ruthlesscompassioninstitute.com/articles/philosophy-psychology/ruthless-compassion-in-relationship-part-ii/#comment-39</link>
		<dc:creator>Thi Stith</dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Wed, 30 Dec 2009 16:16:59 +0000</pubDate>
		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.ruthlesscompassioninstitute.com/?p=77#comment-39</guid>
		<description>Aw, this was a really quality post. In theory I&#039;d like to write like this too - taking time and real effort to make a good article... but what can I say... I procrastinate alot and never seem to get something done.</description>
		<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Aw, this was a really quality post. In theory I&#8217;d like to write like this too &#8211; taking time and real effort to make a good article&#8230; but what can I say&#8230; I procrastinate alot and never seem to get something done.</p>
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		<title>Comment on From Being “In Recovery” to Being Fully Recovered by Nancy Adler</title>
		<link>http://www.ruthlesscompassioninstitute.com/articles/philosophy-psychology/from-being-%e2%80%9cin-recovery%e2%80%9d-to-being-fully-recovered/#comment-38</link>
		<dc:creator>Nancy Adler</dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Wed, 30 Dec 2009 16:02:11 +0000</pubDate>
		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.ruthlesscompassioninstitute.com/?p=99#comment-38</guid>
		<description>Thank you for your magnificent article Dr. Sirota! 

It has been my experience that once I looked at and dealt with what I was masking through my addictions (drugs and gambling), what I found was a renewed relationship with God, myself and my relationships with others.

Early on in my recovery I learned many sound principles in 12-step programs that are filled with wisdom and grace. 

I agree completely that addiction is not a disease. If we keep &#039;saying&#039; we are &#039;sick&#039; it keeps us stuck and stigmatized. I acknowledge myself for the work that was required to look at my wounds from the past. Today, my former addiction(s) no longer define who I am.

I am grateful for my experiences which brought me this far. I am empowered in knowing that I am healed, delivered and recovered. 



God Bless,
 ~ Nancy Adler
www.GamblingOnLife.com
www.GamblingOnLife.ning.com</description>
		<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Thank you for your magnificent article Dr. Sirota! </p>
<p>It has been my experience that once I looked at and dealt with what I was masking through my addictions (drugs and gambling), what I found was a renewed relationship with God, myself and my relationships with others.</p>
<p>Early on in my recovery I learned many sound principles in 12-step programs that are filled with wisdom and grace. </p>
<p>I agree completely that addiction is not a disease. If we keep &#8217;saying&#8217; we are &#8217;sick&#8217; it keeps us stuck and stigmatized. I acknowledge myself for the work that was required to look at my wounds from the past. Today, my former addiction(s) no longer define who I am.</p>
<p>I am grateful for my experiences which brought me this far. I am empowered in knowing that I am healed, delivered and recovered. </p>
<p>God Bless,<br />
 ~ Nancy Adler<br />
<a href="http://www.GamblingOnLife.com" rel="nofollow">http://www.GamblingOnLife.com</a><br />
<a href="http://www.GamblingOnLife.ning.com" rel="nofollow">http://www.GamblingOnLife.ning.com</a></p>
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		<title>Comment on Where Have all the Manners Gone? by Laura Lewis-Barr</title>
		<link>http://www.ruthlesscompassioninstitute.com/articles/philosophy-psychology/where-have-all-the-manners-gone/#comment-30</link>
		<dc:creator>Laura Lewis-Barr</dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Sun, 13 Dec 2009 22:12:10 +0000</pubDate>
		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.ruthlesscompassioninstitute.com/?p=97#comment-30</guid>
		<description>Wow.  Thanks for that post.  I&#039;m struck by the fact that if we are being socialized to avoid healthy assertive communication, what eventually erupts is aggression.  And if children aren&#039;t taught to deal with frustrations early on, they will find it much harder to cope with adult problems.  I just heard of a college student who went to kill his math teacher because he was flunking the class.  (I think this happened this week in VA).</description>
		<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Wow.  Thanks for that post.  I&#8217;m struck by the fact that if we are being socialized to avoid healthy assertive communication, what eventually erupts is aggression.  And if children aren&#8217;t taught to deal with frustrations early on, they will find it much harder to cope with adult problems.  I just heard of a college student who went to kill his math teacher because he was flunking the class.  (I think this happened this week in VA).</p>
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		<title>Comment on Ruthless Compassion in Action by Ron C. de Weijze</title>
		<link>http://www.ruthlesscompassioninstitute.com/articles/philosophy-psychology/ruthless-compassion-in-action/#comment-22</link>
		<dc:creator>Ron C. de Weijze</dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Tue, 24 Nov 2009 22:40:11 +0000</pubDate>
		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://99.192.144.204/?p=10#comment-22</guid>
		<description>Nobody in his right mind can disagree with this, although the world is divided into good though a bit naive gals and bad guys. It can be the other way around, which could explain a difficulty one has with someone like Ayn Rand. The honesty of the latter btw, is that she shows how important it is to show how &#039;selfish&#039; you are, showing what you value is and what you go for. Ruthless would it then be, if pursuing this goals would be at the expense of the other, the spouse. Loving someone because then and only then you get loved back, not for who you are, emotionally and rationally independent, would not be valid. In a way that is what you say too Dr Marcia, with Ruthless Compassion. Just be honest about what you can and cannot take and then measure whether or not the other is willing to take that into the deal or not, and not being worth the deal if he denies. I would like to add that there is another point to this, in honesty. Often, when relationships grow tense for the reasons mentioned or other reasons, honesty becomes disloyalty while loyalty becomes dishonesty. That is where I am looking for solutions. Honesty as an early or at least timely warning, however late it already is, could also be loyalty to one&#039;s values, norms and morality. Then it is ethics against morality, as in this scheme: http://bit.ly/3G4b0o (from a Twitter friend). My psychology/philosophy evolves around this concept of loyalty to whatever it was that brought those primary reactions that might be acted out too nihilistically, perhaps even triggered, which can also be nicely sublimated or idealized by any materialist/pessimistic realist. I see idealistic realism and realistic idealism as two movements which can grow stronger and weaker in society along with the cultivation of sociosis (compare neurosis, psychosis) in a society with values no longer reliable or valid. When peaceful times shift to war times in relationships or in societies, idealistic &#039;hobby&#039; realism shifts toward or makes room for realistic &#039;desperate&#039; idealism until the happy dream is realized.</description>
		<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Nobody in his right mind can disagree with this, although the world is divided into good though a bit naive gals and bad guys. It can be the other way around, which could explain a difficulty one has with someone like Ayn Rand. The honesty of the latter btw, is that she shows how important it is to show how &#8217;selfish&#8217; you are, showing what you value is and what you go for. Ruthless would it then be, if pursuing this goals would be at the expense of the other, the spouse. Loving someone because then and only then you get loved back, not for who you are, emotionally and rationally independent, would not be valid. In a way that is what you say too Dr Marcia, with Ruthless Compassion. Just be honest about what you can and cannot take and then measure whether or not the other is willing to take that into the deal or not, and not being worth the deal if he denies. I would like to add that there is another point to this, in honesty. Often, when relationships grow tense for the reasons mentioned or other reasons, honesty becomes disloyalty while loyalty becomes dishonesty. That is where I am looking for solutions. Honesty as an early or at least timely warning, however late it already is, could also be loyalty to one&#8217;s values, norms and morality. Then it is ethics against morality, as in this scheme: <a href="http://bit.ly/3G4b0o" rel="nofollow">http://bit.ly/3G4b0o</a> (from a Twitter friend). My psychology/philosophy evolves around this concept of loyalty to whatever it was that brought those primary reactions that might be acted out too nihilistically, perhaps even triggered, which can also be nicely sublimated or idealized by any materialist/pessimistic realist. I see idealistic realism and realistic idealism as two movements which can grow stronger and weaker in society along with the cultivation of sociosis (compare neurosis, psychosis) in a society with values no longer reliable or valid. When peaceful times shift to war times in relationships or in societies, idealistic &#8216;hobby&#8217; realism shifts toward or makes room for realistic &#8216;desperate&#8217; idealism until the happy dream is realized.</p>
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		<title>Comment on Conquering the Urge by Esther</title>
		<link>http://www.ruthlesscompassioninstitute.com/articles/philosophy-psychology/conquering-the-urge/#comment-20</link>
		<dc:creator>Esther</dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Mon, 23 Nov 2009 17:49:02 +0000</pubDate>
		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://99.192.144.204/?p=3#comment-20</guid>
		<description>Excellent article that gets right to the heart of the issue and problem. I am one of those psychotherapists that help people heal these parts of themselves which are hurt, stubborn or in rebellion; the self sabatoguing parts of ourselves acting out. People who read this article will greatly benefit from the insight. Your suggestion for addressing late night eating and taking back your power consciously, is a very good start.</description>
		<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Excellent article that gets right to the heart of the issue and problem. I am one of those psychotherapists that help people heal these parts of themselves which are hurt, stubborn or in rebellion; the self sabatoguing parts of ourselves acting out. People who read this article will greatly benefit from the insight. Your suggestion for addressing late night eating and taking back your power consciously, is a very good start.</p>
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		<title>Comment on Ruthless Compassion in Action by Akemi - Yes to Me</title>
		<link>http://www.ruthlesscompassioninstitute.com/articles/philosophy-psychology/ruthless-compassion-in-action/#comment-19</link>
		<dc:creator>Akemi - Yes to Me</dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Sun, 22 Nov 2009 16:24:08 +0000</pubDate>
		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://99.192.144.204/?p=10#comment-19</guid>
		<description>Great article!
I&#039;ve been calling it &quot;detachment&quot;.  You know, not disinterest, but detachment as the highest form of love and compassion, with no manipulative agenda. 

Keep up the wonderful work.  I&#039;ll be following you on Twitter. 

Akemi</description>
		<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Great article!<br />
I&#8217;ve been calling it &#8220;detachment&#8221;.  You know, not disinterest, but detachment as the highest form of love and compassion, with no manipulative agenda. </p>
<p>Keep up the wonderful work.  I&#8217;ll be following you on Twitter. </p>
<p>Akemi</p>
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		<title>Comment on Why the Men in Hollywood Have Lost their Balls by Dorothy</title>
		<link>http://www.ruthlesscompassioninstitute.com/articles/popular-culture/why-the-men-in-hollywood-have-lost-their-balls/#comment-18</link>
		<dc:creator>Dorothy</dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Thu, 19 Nov 2009 12:11:24 +0000</pubDate>
		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://99.192.144.204/?p=16#comment-18</guid>
		<description>With two 20 something sons, I can&#039;t decide whether I&#039;m happy or not! Great article and lots to thing about.</description>
		<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>With two 20 something sons, I can&#8217;t decide whether I&#8217;m happy or not! Great article and lots to thing about.</p>
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		<title>Comment on Where Have all the Manners Gone? by uberVU - social comments</title>
		<link>http://www.ruthlesscompassioninstitute.com/articles/philosophy-psychology/where-have-all-the-manners-gone/#comment-16</link>
		<dc:creator>uberVU - social comments</dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Tue, 03 Nov 2009 23:50:26 +0000</pubDate>
		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.ruthlesscompassioninstitute.com/?p=97#comment-16</guid>
		<description>&lt;strong&gt;Social comments and analytics for this post...&lt;/strong&gt;

This post was mentioned on Twitter by MuchMoreThanMom: Where Have all the Manners Gone? http://ff.im/-aQA0R...</description>
		<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p><strong>Social comments and analytics for this post&#8230;</strong></p>
<p>This post was mentioned on Twitter by MuchMoreThanMom: Where Have all the Manners Gone? <a href="http://ff.im/-aQA0R..." rel="nofollow">http://ff.im/-aQA0R&#8230;</a></p>
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